He said/she said : women, men and language by Deborah Tannen

By Deborah Tannen

Many of the themes explored in those lectures comprise: Who talks extra, males or ladies? Who interrupts extra, ladies or males? What do men and women are likely to discuss? who's extra oblique in asserting what we suggest? Why might an individual be oblique in asserting what we suggest? the place do those transformations come from; how early do they start?

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B) The example in the movie The Kid. i) The character portrayed by Bruce Willis goes back to his childhood with his 8-year-old self and forces his former bully to apologize. (1) Forcing someone to apologize makes them feel as if they have to grovel. c) Some men who have learned to apologize often find that it is a "magic bullet" in helping smooth over communication conflicts. 3) Indirectness is a fundamental part of human communication a) We’re too sophisticated to always spell out exactly what we mean in so many words.

29 Lecture Six: The Interplay of Power and Connection Before beginning this lecture you may want to … Read chapter seven, “Talking Up Close: Status and Connection,” in Deborah Tannen’s Talking from 9 to 5: Women and Men at Work. Introduction: In this lecture, we’ll bring together two threads: What really is the relationship between language and gender? And how do gender patterns dovetail with the dynamics of power and connection? Consider this ... 1. Does telling problems to others result in closeness or vulnerability or both?

Iii) As Carol, she frequently smiles. 3) Importance of smiles in indexing gender a) Erving Goffman: "Smiles function as ritualistic mollifiers, signaling that nothing agonistic is intended or invited, that the meaning of the other’s act has been understood and found acceptable…" i) These smiles seem more the offering of an inferior than a superior. (1) In cross-sex encounters in society, women smile more than men. (2) Women don’t consciously intend to be submissive, they’re just being pleasant.

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